I love you like never before

             
            It's weird how memories could have that great impact in our lives
whether ,if they were sad or happy ones.

I've had this memory with me since the 25th,of Sep ,2010 . the day I lost the half of my heart with my bestfriend's death . this would be probably the first time I talk about it since that day.
I've been pacing back and forth all this time to accept it , but I just couldn't . It still hurt not having her around and me feeling alone most of the time.

Two days before her death , we were together . It was her birthday and we were laughing and talking about finishing high school and go to college together . I still remember it like if it was yesterday . I remember hearing about her death over a phone call her sister made and me being shocked all day.I went to her house . Family and friends were there and me again not being able to speak or even cry . Her Mom hugged me strongly and said things i don't remember ,because I was looking at that crowed and searching for her.

Days went by and I couldn't go through the whole thing or even talk about it to any one . I was always avoiding her Mom and could never look at her in the eye and say sorry for your lost . I tried it once and she gave me that look by her eyes saying " I miss her too" .
I still dream about her and my day could be ruined afterwards and i just can't go on to end it . I could skip school for that and recently I skipped lectures at college . I'd just wake up with that mood can't even do any thing and all I want is to cry and cry till I go to sleep again . 
Now I simply hate September for that .... I couldn't just move on .!!!

Maybe when we get to meet this kind of special people . It gets harder to move on with your life as if nothing happened and you still have to go through the same feelings once in a while . you 'll have to stop for moments in your day and appreciate that time you spent with them and how much you loved and cared for them , but most importantly ,how much you miss their presence in every single second they are not there .


this song explains exactly how i feel 


   click this link to view the song plz..
          Written by : Ahlam  Al-sghier